you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize
