I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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