What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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