..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
love makes seman taste better
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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