I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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