I want to stick my p in your. b.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
