i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
love makes seman taste better
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
