She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present