ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
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