just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Who did Billy Mays play for?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
