i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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