thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
