its not stalking. its research.
Small penises have feelings too.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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