I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
