I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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