worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Randomize