so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
