saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Randomize
