How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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