wat bout pragnant strippers??
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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