i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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