I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
