Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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