He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
