he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Randomize
