Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
