Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
