i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
