Taylor Swift is so right about you.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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