There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
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