I CAN MOONWALK!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
