you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize