Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
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