i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
