you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Are we still banned from the library?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
