Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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