How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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