it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
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Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
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When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
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