I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
