I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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