If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy