He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
