I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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