laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize