you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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