Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Randomize
