Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
