WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
