When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
