the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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