whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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